Sunday, September 30, 2012


Here's my scheduled 8 mile run...uh, yeah.  So, I woke up in Gatlinburg, TN intending to run and was very light headed, almost dizzy.  I went back to bed and figured I'd skip it.  Fast forward, after lunch and shopping in Pigeon Forge and fighting the traffic back to our rented condo in Gatlinburg, we decided to check out the fitness center at the BlueGreen place (that's where we were staying.)

I meant to run 8, but with no fan and a tad warm room, and starting at 7 or so, I decided to throw in the towel after three.  Now, I did run from the fitness center back to our condo, which was up a very steep hill about .5 miles.  But overall for the run, I'm going to mark this one, F.

That gives me an F for the week, and I've decided to repeat this week in my training.  I didn't tell you all, but that 5k that I was planning conflicts with our church's men's retreat, so I'm skipping the race.  All of that means, I have an extra week to play with.

Consider it played.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Non-nocturnal 3

That's right, I did not run this at night.  Anyways, it wasn't as fast as Monday, but then again, I ran 5 yesterday, so there's that.

Tomorrow, we head down to Gatlinburg, TN; I've got an eight mile run planned for Saturday, so if you read about a mid-40's man found dead by the side of the road down might be me and you'll know that I probably won't be entering that half marathon.

But, if the Democrats can get ahold of my information, I'll probably be among the voting dead in the November election...

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Ho Hum Fiver

Wasn't really into this run; was kinda tired.  The legs were a bit achy.  The weather was overcast and somewhat humid.  It was a blah run, was necessary.

Tomorrow I have three miles that I might take easy too.  Saturday, we may be in Gatlinburg, TN, so I'll have to find an eight mile route to run.  If I remember correctly, the place we are staying sits on a hill, so the last bit is going to be uphill...yay...

Monday, September 24, 2012

Papa's got a brand new pair of shoes

I was in Lawrence, MA last week, and as everyone knows, the New Balance factory is there.  In fact, I could see the building just a half mile up the river from where I was being trained (they didn't have to use any waterboarding techniques this time.)  So, after some debating, I bought a pair of shoes that were the same model as my current shoes but in a different color.

Now comes the fun part of breaking them in!  I've decided to do one short run a week in them for a couple of weeks.  Then, when I feel like my old shoes have given me all the life that they can give, I'll toss them aside for a nicely broken-in new pair.

So, the day was beautiful for running: sunny, high 60's, slight wind.  I do like spring and fall running; don't have to get blasted by a face full of heat.  I decided to set my "too fast" alarm at 11 min/mile and make it scream the whole run.  Mission accomplished!

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Back to Indy

Here is the six mile run that my schedule demanded.  Like last Saturday's run, I sandbagged until the last mile to make sure that I'd make it all the way.  This sandbagging was a bit faster than last week's, though, which is encouraging.  The last mile was slower, which is to be expected.  Hey, I'm not a machine!

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Speedy work and revised schedule mile.  I somehow ran afoul of the schedule that I posted - I think I skipped a week in my thinking.  I was faced with total miles of 8, 12, and 18 for the two weeks prior to this week and this week.  That's not good.

So, I reworked the schedule and came up with this (the runs in yellow, I have already completed):

Week of Mon Wed Thu Sat Total % increase
9/9/2012 3.00 4.00 5.00 12.00
9/16/2012 3.00 5.00 1.00 6.00 15.00 1.25
9/23/2012 3.00 5.00 3.00 8.00 19.00 1.27
9/30/2012 5.00 6.00 3.00 10.00 24.00 1.26
10/7/2012 5.00 9.00 3.00 12.00 29.00 1.21
10/14/2012 3.00 3.10 6.10 0.21
10/21/2012 3.00 5.00 3.00 9.00 20.00 0.69
10/28/2012 3.00 13.1 16.10 0.81

You can see that I changed my Friday run to Thursdays and that today's run mile! I wanted my fourth day to be easy when I added it, so, there you go.  I did, however, try to make it a fast mile so that I got some benefit out of it.

So, the week of Oct 14, I'm planning on running a 5k, and the following week, the total is related to the week before the 5k for the % increase (or in this case, decrease.)

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

This is a paved trail!

This is run was on the paved trail along the street from the hotel.  I added a couple of detours/additional mileage so that I ended up back near the hotel, running down hill for that last mile.

I saw two deer and a fawn (two and a half deer, I reckon, if my math still reflects reality); I'm not sure they saw me as they didn't give chase.  Either that, or by the way I was shuffling along, they thought the zombie apocalypse had started and decided to get out of Dodge.

The first and fourth miles were both up the same hill; it's nice to see I maintain about the same pace whether up or down hills.  I had a "too fast" pace alarm set at 11 min/mile, so I'd back off when I heard the alarm.  The last mile, I tried to keep it in constant alarm state; I'm offensive that way...

Monday, September 17, 2012

It's a trail????

I thought this was a paved trail here in Lawrence, MA. isn't.  It's a single track by the river with roots and trees and poison ivy (or oak) I'm sure.  I did see a deer, and thankfully it didn't try to eat my eyes.  Those deer are vicious...

So...I went out way too fast and had to take a breather a couple of times.  I definitely won't be doing this path for my five miler (there's another paved path that's about a mile in length around here.), but I am glad that I did it for this run.  I just wish I hadn't tried to do it so fast.

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Sandbagging...I does it

I had to make sure that I could run the whole way before I unleashed the...uh...muscles legs.  Yeah.  I had to give them permission to...uh, to run.  Not that they felt that great to begin with; kinda like running with lead legs.  But after four miles, I loosened up enough to lay down a fast mile.Well, not fast, but faster...

This was a run/bike event as Brandy rode her bike and provided water support to me.  It was nice to have her along for some conversation and, of course, the occasional drink.

Here is my tentative schedule to prepare for the Nov 3rd half marathon.
Week of Mon Wed Fri Sat Total % increase
9/9/2012 3.00 3.00 4.00 5.00 15.00  
9/16/2012 3.00 5.00 3.00 7.00 18.00 1.20
9/23/2012 4.00 6.00 3.00 9.00 22.00 1.22
9/30/2012 5.00 7.00 3.00 11.00 26.00 1.18
10/7/2012 5.00 9.00 3.00 13.00 30.00 1.15
10/14/2012 3.00     3.10 6.10 0.20
10/21/2012 3.00 5.00 3.00 9.00 20.00 0.67
10/28/2012 3.00     13.1 16.10 0.81  

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Time for more

More miles!  And this Saturday?  Five!  This week is going to be the toughest, I think as I'm still getting my legs under me.  Next week will be even more miles, but not as big a jump as from last week.  Also, it will be split over 4 days instead of three.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Bike with Brandy

Now if I drank some brandy on this ride, it might have been more interesting, but instead, my wife and I just rode around the neighborhood.  It's a good start for her.

Monday, September 10, 2012

Three miles and a plan

Hey lookit that: each mile was faster than the one before.  That means (roughly 10 seconds/mile quicker) if I ran just 42 more miles, maintaining the decreasing time/mile, I could break the world record for the mile!

Unfortunately, I decided to stop.  That record will stand a bit longer, I suppose.

Ok, the plan: Start hitting up long runs on Saturdays, add one more day of running/week for 4x, get my long run up to 12-13 miles by late October, and run the Monumental Marathon Half Marathon on Nov 3rd.  This will also serve as my official challenge to Gary the Exploding Unicorn to a foot race of approximately 13.1 miles to run concurrent with the aforementioned half marathon.

Special rules for the foot race are as follows:
1.  No biting.
2.  No full nelsons (half nelsons are allowed)
3.  No throat punches, groin kicks, or bamboo under the fingernail moves.
4.  For Hank the Unicorn, no running.
5.  For Rusty the Nutjob, no walking.
6.  No motorized vehicle assistance of any kind (if you need an ambulance ride, you will be disqualified.)

I will assume you agree to these terms, Terry, and will save a spot for you near the back of the pack where I will start.  Remember, when the gun goes off, you will have to do the two hour version of the hokey pokey before you are allowed to start as all unicorns must do.

May the best man win!  (see what I did there unicorn boy?  snicker...)

Friday, September 7, 2012

Another setback my efforts to lead a more sedentary lifestyle.  On the plus side, this run was over a minute and a half faster than Monday's run.

The cause of all my running failures
I took Denali for the first mile and had to stop at the .34 mile mark for her to do some business.  I also stopped at one mile to put her in the house and grab a drink.

I'm pretty happy with the run.  I was winded at the end (well, wasn't in too good a shape after mile 1, but that's besides the point), but I was glad I maintained pace.

Next week, I go back on eight hour days, so I'll be getting home around 3 pm.  Hopefully the weather has cooled off and I can start getting in some longer runs before I have to fix dinner at 5 pm.  If dinner ain't on the table at 5:30, there had better be a good reason or into the box for the remainder of the evening.

Don't like the box...

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

I can quit any time.

On one of my running posts, Dave "Exploding" Unicorn suggested that I enter a 12 step program to help me return to a more sedentary lifestyle. This run was a setback in that endeavor.

It was, however, the fastest mile that I've run since May.  Speeeeeeeeedeeeeee!

Some Musings

 Filling in the ellipsis.

Exploding, over at Exploding Unicorn (I suspect that is not his given name and will assign him a name as I write this), has an implied challenge on the subtitle to his blog, namely:

...and that's where we get the saying, "It exploded like a unicorn."

As you can see, the dot dot dot (aka an ellipsis) implies that there is a story behind the conclusion, and I have decided to pick up the gauntlet that Bob the Unicorn has thrown down.  But first, a little ado about unicorn theory, light wave concepts, and  misconceptions about this fearsome and capable creature.

Challenger Billy the Horned Horse has a reputation for erratic Halo deaths, wantonly lacking parenting skills, and a super work avoiding ethic.  While all that he does is an example for all of us to attain, he is a representation of the species, one should not confuse the sample with the whole.  Jimbo here is the exception that has spawned many a unicorn misconception as well as most of the outright lies attributed to the fairy creatures.

The most egregious myth that is attributed to Greg, and his kind - pointed headed equines, is that they eat sunshine and poop rainbows.  The more mundane humans actually think they eat ordinary grains, but even the casual observer can see that is demonstrably false.  After 10.45 years of studying unicorns, and some of that time intensely, I have concluded that this terrifying being does not crap rainbows, but eats them.

Now, this explanation is not without its detractors, and I'm sure that Yogi over at that blog can clarify his diet, but for now, I'm going with what evidence I have before me.  A quick aside, some corroborating evidence for this is the observation from Peggy (from my chiropractor's office) that the lack of rain this summer has taken a huge toll on the unicorn population.  It finally clicked as to why I've been seeing unicorn corpses all over the road as of late.

So, unicorns eat light, which consists of several different wavelengths in the light spectrum.  It is vitally important that one understands, embraces, and propagates this fact.  I have not been able to identify unicorn droppings, but I suspect they are either Hello Kitty gear, puppies, kittens, or boy bands.  One hopes the need for eliminating doesn't happen often in the case of the latter.

The next part of the theory is pure conjecture, but is readily verifiable with the use of an infrared/ultraviolet waveform generator with subtle x-ray and gamma ray overtones.  Unfortunately, mine was in the shop, so you'll have to verify it on your own.

As we have proven without a doubt, unicorns eat rainbows.  Now, what other person, place, or thing does one associate with rainbows?  No, not Key West.  No, not Rainbow Brite...  NO NOT SKITTLES!!  LEPRECHAUNS YOU DOLT!  Ahem.  Sorry.  Yes, wee little leprechauns, hiding their gold at the end of...unicorn food.

Of course, everyone can see where this is going, but for the sake of a complete, scientific paper, I will state obvious:  Occasionally, through no fault of their own, a very small (see what I did there?) number of leprechauns are accidentally eaten by unicorns.  I mean, really, who hasn't accidentally eaten a bug or even a small bird when chowing down on their seafood fettuccine alfredo?  I'm sure I'm not the only one.

While every leprechaun that dies is a tragedy in the little community of the lucky ones (one could viably argue for the unlucky ones being weeded out by errant unicorns), it is beyond the scope of this blog post to go into such matters.  What is in the scope of this increasingly long and vitally important piece is the effects of such an interaction between Percy the unicorn and Sam the leprechaun, may he rest in peace.

To help visualize the catastrophic result of a unicorn eating (accidentally or on purpose) a non-light waveform spectrum food, grab the nearest solar panel and whatever passes for a leprechaun around your house.  As I hate the environment and have no solar panels in a 100 mile radius of me, I substituted a cheese grater.  As for what passes for a leprechaun, my dog Denali was the closest thing, but unfortunately got wind of the impending experiment and booked a flight to Maui for the duration, so I had to use a tomato plant.

Now that you have your "solar panel" and your "leprechaun", push the "leprechaun" through the "solar panel" without breaking the "solar panel."  In my equal but different experiment, I was able to accomplish this with the aid of a hammer and oven mitts.  The results were not pretty; in fact, the "leprechaun" (I am going to use a scientific term here) "gummed up the works."

The same scientific term can be used to describe what happens when a being whose dietary habits consist solely of the light spectrum ingests something that is part of the physical, albeit mythical, world.  The unicorn's inner workings are, in the words of the late Rascal T. Pickens, "all gummed up in dere."

Unfortunately, the affected unicorn has no clue as to its fatal condition and continues to prance about eating more and more rainbows.  With no way to pass the rainbows into Slayer t-shirts, puppies, kitties, or boy bands, the unicorn then begins to increase in size like a water balloon being filled with a hose.  The laws of physics refuse to make exceptions and eventually, the unicorn...explodes.

...and that's where we get the saying, "It exploded like a unicorn."

Todd, you're welcome.

Monday, September 3, 2012

Back where we started...

Here we 'round again.

A little more mileage, a little slower; although, I thought I went really slow the first mile and was pleasantly surprised when I looked at it when I logged my run.

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Aaaaaaaaand three

Ok, so finally I get three runs done in one week.  We'll see about adding some distance next week.  I said, "We'll see" - that's not a promise...